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Chapter Twenty-Six: CLEANSING THE TEMPLE

The Jade Steps

Chapter Twenty-Six:  Cleansing The Temple

Much of the royal household was transferred to the Palace of Axayacatl.  Montezuma's chefs set up the royal kitchens, attendants the royal baths, servants the royal wardrobe, so that he was fed, bathed, and clothed as before.  Suitable quarters were arranged for his wives and concubines, which he frequently visited.  His retinue of courtiers and counselors was with him throughout the day.  Petitioners and ambassadors from various parts of the empire came to plea with him or present him with tribute. 

All seemed normal – with one difference.  The only guards, of (more…)

THE WORLD BOGRAKAB CUP

For at least a quarter-century now, I've been hearing the same mantra from soccer enthusiasts:  "Every little kid in America plays soccer.  When they grow up, soccer will be more popular than football or baseball."

This hasn't happened and never will happen.  Kids love to run around and kick a ball.  Watching grown-ups do it has all the drama of watching paint dry. 

A majority of Americans will not pay much attention to the World Cup this month while the rest of the world goes bananas about it because "soccer" should really be named "bograkab" – bunch-of-guys-running-around-kicking-a-ball.

Here's a synopsis (more…)

BACK IN ‘NAM

One of the first things George W. Bush did as his presidency was getting off the ground in 2001was to sign a bilateral trade agreement with Vietnam.  Since then, trade between the US and Vietnam has grown 400% to $7.8 billion last year.  Last week, the US and Vietnam signed an agreement that paves the way for Vietnam to join the WTO, the World Trade Organization.

And yesterday, Monday, June 5, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld was in Hanoi meeting Vietnam's Defense Minister Pham Van Tra and Prime Minister Phan Van Khai.  Noting that a US Navy ship will soon (more…)

REPUBLICANS’ LUCK: DEMOCRATS DUMBER THAN THEY ARE

Just when you think Republicans couldn't be dumber – passing the Senate Shamnesty bill, House Speaker Denny Hastert demanding Congress be above the law and letting Democrat crook William Jefferson off the hook, on and on – the Democrats up the stupidity ante.

Starting to panic that Her Royal Sowness, Queen Hillary, just might be presidentially unelectable, they dump the PIAPS and go, hearts-a-flutter, for Mr. Hairshirt, Algore.

Too dumb to grasp that Americans on the whole refuse to scared by "end of civilization" global warming doomsaying, the entire left-wing political/media machine is cranked up for Hairshirt Al. 

To top (more…)

GAZA IS DARWIN CITY

You've heard of the Darwin Awards, right?  They're awarded to idiots who kill themselves doing something astoundingly dumb, thereby contributing to human evolution by removing themselves from the gene pool.

Awardees are individuals, but I am nominating an entire inhabited region of the world:  Palestinian Gaza.  Gaza should, in fact, be re-named Darwin City.  Consider this news bulletin from Gulf Daily News of Bahrain, dated May 27, 2006:

GAZA CITY: Four Palestinians were killed in northern Gaza yesterday as Israel fired dozens of artillery shells into the territory. Three men died and five other were wounded in a house (more…)

OILY LIES OF THE LEFT

With oil prices reaching record levels, the left is up to its old tricks, blaming the President and calling for lots of expensive big government "solutions". As part of this push, they argue that we're running out of oil.

But clearly, this argument is not new — and it's dead wrong.

In 1874, Pennsylvania's state geologist fretted that America had only a four-year supply of oil left. He was wrong.

In 1914, Washington claimed we had only a ten-year supply. It was wrong.

In 1940, the government announced that reserves would be depleted within 15 years. Wrong again.

In 1977, (more…)

AHMADINUTJOB

The Mahmoud Ahmadinejad interview in Der Spiegel has its moments, to be sure, but overall it's about what you would expect. He's an uncultured fanatic who will never admit error but simply reassert his lies.  We should transliterate his name from Farsi as Ahmadinutjob. (Thanks to Ariel Cohen of the Heritage Foundation for this suggestion.) 

He's not at all interested in what we call "the pursuit of the truth," so there is no real interview or dialogue (the crowd calling for negotiations with this regime ought to study this text, because if they do it seriously they will realize that (more…)

HOW TO FAX FROM YOUR PC

You call your attorney to ask her to review a contract, and she says, "Sure. Fax it over." "But it's a Microsoft Word document," you say. "Can't I just e-mail it to you? I don't have a fax machine." No, she prefers fax. Or, she says, if you'd rather, you can drop it in the mailbox or drive it over. Grrr! 

But wait! You probably do have a fax machine and don't even realize it. It's right in your PC. You may have forgotten this if you've moved to broadband, but most computers still ship with fax modems. And Microsoft (more…)

THE FRAUD OF THE ANTI-WAR LEFT

Jesse Macbeth, a self-styled "special forces ranger," regaled moonbat audiences with tales of the atrocities he committed in Iraq:

"Fallujah is where we slaughtered people in mosques," he said.  "We would dig holes and leave mass graves of children, women and old men."

Unfortunately for Mr. Macbeth, he made a video which was seen by actual veterans. In it, he is wearing his beret improperly ("like a pastry chef," said an Army spokesman).  He's wearing a Ranger beret, but it has a Special Forces flash.  The sleeves on his BDU jacket are rolled up the way the Marines do it; (more…)

SHRINKING SERBIA

In the summer of 1982, I was invited to participate in a Guinness Festival, along with a number of other Guinness World Record holders, held in Austria's Lake District.

At the welcoming reception, we all went around to each other to introduce ourselves and ask, "What are you in the book for?"

There was a fellow with the most consecutive situps: over 27,000.  Another with the most consecutive one-armed pushups: over 600.  A lady with the most consecutive hours belly-dancing.  A rotund guy with the most consecutive hours treading water.

And yes, it was cool for me to answer:  Sky-diving (more…)

THERE IS NO SUCH COUNTRY AS IRAN

At a meeting of the Nonaligned Movement in the Malaysian city of Putrajaya this week, Iran's Foreign Minister Manoucher Mottaki announced to reporters that "there is no such country" as Israel.

Since Israel does indeed exist, Mottaki means that Iran doesn't diplomatically "recognize" Israel's existence, that Iran wants to extinguish the political existence of Israel, that Israel's current existence is accidental, an illusion that will be swept away by the total triumph of Islam in the Middle East.

Israel Foreign Minister Tzipi Livni should now feel free to announce that there is no such country as Iran.  Its existence as (more…)

BUGGED BY WEB BUGS

I signed up several months ago for a service which gave me free delivery on some products (value $10), knowing I would get a weekly e-mail from the business.

I never got around to reading those weekly messages, and they began to pile up in my e-mail box. After a few months, I got a message from the company with this title: "Dennis – Are you missing out on a good thing?"

No, sir or ma’am, I am not – or at least I didn’t plan to. I opened the message and read the following: "Dear Dennis: We’ve noticed that (more…)

IRAN UNRAVELING?

"The Voice of America is not in the business of persuading Iranians to overthrow their government," declared VOA Director David Jackson in Washington the other day.  He said this with a wink as he then noted the "amazing number" of e-mails his office receives daily now begging America:  "Please invade Iran!"

Things have not been going well for Ahmadinejad the Persian Midget and his sour band of terrorist mullahs this week.  This is thanks to Porter Goss giving Michael Hayden a lesson in how to run psy-ops at the CIA before his departure tomorrow (Friday, 5/26).

The day after Alberto (more…)

HOW DIFFERENT IS AMERICAN EDUCATION FROM COMMUNISM?

When I went to college I had my biggest problem with the discipline of history. It may have started when I was a kid in Hungary and first ran up against official "scholars" who rewrote Hungary’s history-renamed the streets in Budapest, rewrote all the textbooks, and reshuffled the holidays, and even completely recast Western intellectual history.

Under Marxism there was room for just one account of the development of philosophy, namely, what Karl Marx and his epigones wrote.

At first I thought that in a relatively free society historians could be trusted a lot more than under Marxism. But I (more…)

CONGRESS: OUT OF TOUCH AND ABOVE THE LAW

A rare bipartisan unity was achieved in the House of Representatives this week.  What was it that brought lawmakers together?  A determination to win the war on terror?  A plan to secure our borders?  A compromise to save Social Security from bankruptcy?

Nah.  Democratic and Republican leaders in the House joined together to protest the search the FBI made last weekend of the offices of Rep. William Jefferson (D-La), who is under investigation for allegedly accepting a bribe from a Kentucky businessman.

Partisan differences are set aside when (and apparently only when) the privileges of lawmakers are threatened.

One would (more…)